Dear Mr. President,

Did Gunner let you stay up late to watch Saddam's execution on TV? Did Laura let you fondle Saddam's pistol while you watched him die? Did you call up Poppy to ask him who's got the bigger cojones now?

And don't worry about ending up at the end of a rope yourself -- when you're convicted of crimes against humanity by the International Criminal Court, I'll ask them to spare your life and let you rot in the kind of cell where you've been keeping Jose Padilla.